PHU: Corcoran

If you have to go to prison in California, try to get into the Protective Housing Unit in Corcoran. It's primo. It has all the famous felons, meals prepared by staff only (to include a sack lunch that inmates can eat whenever they choose), and no official lights-out policy.
It's the safest place in the entire California prison system, aside from that one unfortunate incident in 1999 when someone left a door open and general population inmates rushed in, beating up mass-murderer Juan Corona and smashing Charles Manson's guitar.
Of course, even in prison you'll have to deal with life's little hassles:

In most prison settings, said Richard Caruso, a former correctional officer at Corcoran who guarded protective unit inmates in the early 1990s, informing on a fellow inmate would probably result in quick reprisal or even death. But inside the unit's safe confines, many snitches operate with impunity.

"The PHU inmates are always telling on each other, trying to make themselves look good in the eyes of staff," he said.

For several hours a day, the inmates are free to roam and eat inside a large day room with metal tables and chairs. During a tour of the unit in the late 1990s, a reporter encountered Manson, wearing Birkenstocks and pleading with top corrections officials that his guitar be returned.

Nearby, a gang hit-man-turned-informant, his body covered with tattoos, wanted his photo taken as he held up a Bible. In the corner, Corona was mumbling that guards had denied him access to a plot of chili peppers he had planted in the yard. In the center of it all, a child molester had two tables piled high with legal documents as he prepared another appeal. "Welcome to my law office," he said with an ironic grin.

"It is like a Beckett play," said Fresno attorney Catherine Campbell, referring to late Irish dramatist Samuel Beckett, known for plays about people in absurd situations. "It is full of very strange people, packed in together.

Sounds like it would make a great new drama series for CBS.
If convicted, this will be Michael Jackson's new home. Celebrities really do get all the breaks.