CMA Awards

Geez, Jack Sparks's column on last night's CMA awards is a riot, and so true:

Oh God, give it to me. Tim and Faith. Country's "First Couple"
Here's my issue...this is a song about a fractured relationship. Every goddamned video, article, and scripted photo shoot we see of these two tells us they're halfway up each other's orifices at all times in wedded bliss. George and Tammy they're not. What informs this performance other than overwrought melodrama? His voice is weak and hers is surprisingly strong.

I'm going to hit pause here and say something that makes me want to throw up. Theirs was a game effort. It wasn't a country song. But, it was a good soap opera song. They gave it the old college try. He barely did anything, and for that, he gets a thumbs down. But she really tried, so let's give her some credit. Jesus, I hate myself. If only they had sung a country song. You're neither one of you Johnny and June...you're not even Johnny and June's crusty dirty underwear. But that's a different blog.

Jack didn't mention Alison Krauss's dress, though, so I'll have to deduct points from his overall score. Her being the most talented woman in the auditorium cuts no ice with me when it comes to fashion.