Awesome. Want my family recipe for "Brutter?"

Old family recipes can be valuable! You sure you want to just give it away?

Man, you crazy Floridians! Everybody in the whole world, even Johnny the Swan, knows you make tunst with Miracle Whip.

In that case, my recipe lacks clarity. I thought it went without saying that "mayonnaise"=Miracle Whip. I was a grown, married woman before my hand touched a jar of Hellman's.

" "mayonnaise"=Miracle Whip. I was a grown, married woman before my hand touched a jar of Hellman's."

Beg to differ. "Mayonnaise"="MAYONNAISE". I was a grown, married woman before my hand touched a jar of Miracle Whip and it hasn't touched a thing since ~ because I chewed it off so I would never touch another jar of that vile whipped goo.

But that's just me. (I won't touch Kraft's version of "mayonnaise" either ~ I think they jar it up right next to the Miracle Whip. "Miracle" ~ pffft.)

Take it back, sister. Take it back RIGHT NOW.

and it hasn't touched a thing since ~ because I chewed it off so I would never touch another jar of that vile whipped goo.

Agreed. Miracle Whip is like mayonnaise that's been left in the sun for 3 days. And then peed in by cats.

That's a brave and contrarian stand you're taking there, Bill---knowing that I can't come over there and punch your lights out.

Mrs. Crosby has to buy a little jar of mayonaisse
for daughter #2 (she got contaminated somewhere)

I know a great recipe for fishing excursions, its called Mustard and Bread..

btw my wife likes you now, Donnah

"fixed lunch today"

I am surprised no one asked you if lunch was broken

MMMMmmmmm good! I like to add a little chopped celery to the tuna & mayo, for added crunch!

And even *I* know that Miracle Whip is the only way to go... and I spend my life hangin' upside down off the bottom of the earth!!!

Karen in Melbourne, Australia

SQUAWK Dukes AWK-AWK!

actually, Duke's is good for something...

you smoke mullet with it..but that was a secret.

Sorry, I don't have a Parrot-English dictionary, B Moe.
Next time, I'll nail a mayonnaise-jar lid to your head before drop-kicking your feathered butt back to your boss over at Big Mayonnaise Journal.

I'll tell you the difference between Miracle Whip and mayonnaise - it's mustard. As someone who has a violent mustard allergy I know this lesson well.

I once attended a family reunion on my husband's side where his relatives proudly announced that just for me they had not put any mustard in the salads - Just Miracle Whip. When I told them Miracle Whip contains mustard they flat out denied it. I had to haul out a jar and make them read the ingredients pannel.

Hip hip hooray for Hellman's!

I was born and lived in FL for most of my natural life (recently relocated to West NC cuz all the yankees have taken over the state of FL), and no self respecting cracker I know uses that non-mayo miracle whip goo.

Ick, I mean really, that stuff is nasty. I'd rather eat coon turds on sweet cornbread. You eat mayo on sandwiches, and cornbread is sure as hell not sweet. It's just how it is.

If you want to say that nobody you know uses it, Bud, then say it, but don't hand me the "no self-respecting" crap. This isn't grits or cornmeal. My mother and father use it, so I'll tell you to kiss my ass in the county square if you're going to insult my mama and daddy.

Will there be any organized rioting to go along with this mayonnaise v. Miracle Whip controversy? I've got some mayo with wasabe in it - it actually is made that way. Does this disqualify me from joining in? I hope not because I wanted to make a sign that read something like "My mayo is good enough for Mohammed". Is there a specfic flag that we need to bring for burning?

Well, I hope you saved the jar, because later on it's Molotov cocktail time.

tfhr says "I've got some mayo with wasabe in it"

come to think of it...THOSE guys use mayo on
teka maki roll too...

Nothing is worse than ordering a sandwich w/mayo at a deli and finding out on the first bite that they used miracle whip. Blech!!!!

There is only one legally authorized Mayo in the South. It is Hellmans. I spent my childhood in Michigan, (watching the UAW-CIO running the auto industry off), and started out on Miracle Whip, (family called it Salad Dressing). By 1958 I was in South Texas eating the Real Deal. But anyway, "Tunst"? I've made tuna sandwiches forever, and wouldn't think of sharing my secret ingredients with anyone. Once went through a 3 year horrible marriage and didn't let her know how I made such good sandwiches. She's from 'da Bronx, so she doesn't know real food.
Hey! Thank a Vet today!
nuf sed

but don't hand me the "no self-respecting" crap.

Meow!

Heat gettin' to you, Cracker? Can't absorb the truth of your SHAM SPREAD?

yw, Frank..! but that doesnt exempt you from me asking...

Are you implying you 'know southern'..??

Deep South mayo is preferred by rednecks, it's
still available I think. I didn't realize I had
married 'up' until my bride brought MW home from
Publix..Texas has ALWAYS had a tough time conforming
to the south.

...now I know why Donnah made us go outside...

Dukes is the mayo of the south, sadly.

Never heard of it. Y'all must be shopping in Winn Dixie. Florida has beautiful Publix stores and people don't have to be dragging home things like that dry Deep South brand peanut butter. *snap*

"(family called it Salad Dressing)."

Kraft calls it that on the label ~ it's just a Southern euphemism for "emulsified nutria turds", like when they say "how interesting" in the South, they mean "bullshit".

Kinda reminds me of the marmite vs. vegemite arguments (I like both).

Mayonnaise is good on some things and Miracle whip is good on some things. I agree with Donnah about the MW and tuna. OTOH, I like mayo on if it's a meat and cheese sandwich... I have no idea why.

But I like having both sides accusing me of apostacy (that's why I mentioned vegemite and marmite - just in case another Aussie and a Brit might wander by) ;)

Look what I started.

See here...this mayo v. Miracle Whip business is foolish. It has simply been determined through extensive scientific testing that mayonnaise is crap (from France), and Miracle Whip is the top of the pops (as brought to mankind by angels sent from our dear sweet heavenly Lord Jesus). Why mayo is better, or how it's better, or any other fey hand-waving is just a reflection of your own shortcomings.

And, well...I didn't really want to say this, but -- they don't stop there, believe me.

Scott ~ how interesting.

ROTFL. I've used that one a thousand times myself, sister.
Now go bring me a switch off the tree.

You wanna know the real true secret to inner peaced and happiness? Fat Free Miracle Whip! It's extra vinegary!!!

"Never heard of it. Y'all must be shopping in Winn Dixie."

Uh, no. And actually, it was at Harris Teeter, Food Lion, Bi-Lo and, years ago, A&P. Dukes outsold MW about 5 to 1, and Hellmans about 3 to 1. When I used to set store, we would have enough facings of MW on the shelf to fit 1 case, same with Hellmans, but we would make sure we would have enough facings for 3 cases on Dukes. This was in NC, SC and GA. Perhaps FL is an anomaly?

Perhaps?

(Piss off, Bingley. Your 'south' consists of Augusta National or Rio. Hardly the person to comment on the pulse of the place: the peculiarities of the peasantry and their predilection for pernicious pastes.)

(sniff)