You don't really need a plastic surgeon to make your face less attractive; you can do that all by yourself:
A young woman from Chongqing sought plastic surgery to make her face less attractive recently, after being crossed in love.The 23-year-old woman's sweetheart left her weeks ago to stay with another woman. Although the two had been in love for six years, her ex-boyfriend feared that her too-beautiful face might lure many other men and thus he didn't feel safe staying with her.
She came to hate all men after being courted by many others, prompting her desire for the surgery. But the doctors refused to co-operate, saying she had a mental disorder and needed to seek help from psychotherapists.
If the boyfriend wasn't Chinese, and therefore inscrutable to me, I'd say he was blowing smoke up her ass. It's a good break-up line with a fuse long enough for a clean getaway before she realizes it was BS.
I didn't have time to develop a standard break-up line as, being a tasty bag of groceries, I was snapped almost immediately after going on the market. I've hence decided that "I want you to be happy" sounds pretty good.
Anybody have a fave that they used on someone, or that someone used on them?
(Via Fark.)
Posted by floridacracker at October 24, 2006 09:54 AM"it's not you, it's me". is that a corollary of "i want you to be happy"?
Posted by: richard at October 24, 2006 12:12 PMYes, I believe it is. Is that a good one? One of my girlfriends would insist on immediate marriage to make him spook. I thought that was overly dramatic, but she swore by it.
Posted by: Donnah at October 24, 2006 12:16 PMHow about, "Honey? Do you ever find dead people ... attractive?"
As for the woman in the story, nothing a diving header into a gravel pit won't fix.
Posted by: Bill from INDC at October 24, 2006 01:39 PMThat would work.
Gravel pit, even something as simple as a magic magic would do the trick, if only temporarily.
Posted by: Donnah at October 24, 2006 02:09 PMNever had to make up a good breakup line because I never managed to make up a good pickup line.
Posted by: marc at October 24, 2006 02:27 PMThe corollary for immediate marriage for a guy is to talk about how you want 10 kids. A friend swore by this one, and the most common reply he got was along the lines of "have them yourself."
I didn't have time to develop a standard break-up line as, being a tasty bag of groceries, I was snapped almost immediately after going on the market. I've hence decided that "I want you to be happy" sounds pretty good.
I have never heard that turn of phrase, and it is flogging brilliant! "Tasty bag of groceries" Kills me.
I generaly don't have to break up with women, I either just distance myself from them gradually over a month, and then just let it fall apart, or I let my shining personality come out in full force and speak honestly. Thats usually enough to scare them off enough to only be buds or "buds" after that.
Posted by: Wickedpinto at October 24, 2006 06:30 PM"I've been sentenced to six years in prison."
or
"In my religion, we can have four wives."
I told a really rich girl she needed to find a really rich guy...but it was a lie. She was just too
much like her Dad..in the physique area. Plus she went to Florida State.
Tasty bag 'o Groceries.. that's a keeper. I'll give you credit for three uses, then it's public domain, Donnah.
Posted by: csason at October 24, 2006 11:36 PMMr. Cracker called me that back during the last Reagan administration. Not bad for a physics major.
Posted by: Donnah at October 26, 2006 07:01 AM