Protecting Our Border

I'm getting tired of Georgians coming into our kitchen and kicking our dog:

Kingsland has a celebrity of sorts living within its royal walls; it is home to a young and shy boy whose hair has been deemed "the best mullet in Jacksonville." And he has a massive six-foot trophy to prove it.

Dakota Russ, 9, stood in front of thousands of people in the pit of Jacksonville's Alltel stadium at the Monster Jam truck show Saturday, Feb. 24 and showed off his pride and glory: his long, raven mullet. He is a shy kid, but that particular day he broke out of his shell to get the crowd riled up and he had the whole stadium screaming for him.

He and his mullet won the favor of the crowd over the six other contestants and he took home not only the six-foot trophy, which, by the way, is topped with a little man who has a mullet, but he also won bragging rights for one year. This means he has the right to tell everyone and everything in sight that he, Dakota Russ, has the best mullet in Jacksonville, hands-down, no questions asked.

However, he may not vocal those rights too loudly. He is a mild-mannered, quiet type, and when asked how he felt about winning, he merely shook his head and whispered, "I am excited."

His family members, on the other hand, were very vocal and had no problem sharing their excitement.

"When they got to him the crowd went wild screaming," his mother, Rosemary Johnson, said. "I was like, ahhhhhh!"

"Yeah, we were so excited we lost out voices screaming," his 11-year-old sister Josephine Johnson chimed in.

"I was just so happy, because I had been so nervous that he would not win. We could not walk five steps without someone stopping us to get a picture," his mother said.

His mother said she has wanted to enter him into the contest for the past two years, but they were unable to make it the Jam. Consequently, this is his first year competing and his family is very excited that he won against competitors who have been in the contest previously. He plans to enter the contest in the future, but he may have some tough competition next year ... his dad may enter too.

The video of the imp gloating in his triumph over us is almost unbearable.