It Used To Be Missippi

But it had to let its belt out a few notches:

Experts say Mississippians need to skip the gravy, say no to the fried pickles and start taking brisk walks to fight an epidemic of obesity.

According to a new study, this Deep South state is the fattest in the nation. The Trust for America's Health, a research group that focuses on disease prevention, says Mississippi is the first state where more than 30 percent of adults are considered obese.

I'm not getting the fried pickles reference. Never heard of them, never read of them. It looks like some restaurant came up with them as a gimmick and now reporters think it's common fare in the South. Common fare would be the hog fat we use like a condiment. It's good on just about everything.

I won't even tell you about the disgraceful episode with the Easter ham that'd just come out of the oven, but I will say that several knives were simultaneously slashing over that pan, and it wasn't the meat that was being cut off and devoured. Standing right there on the spot.

Mr. Cracker came home the other day with a gorgeous and pricey ceramic container whose special purpose wasn't readily apparent to me. "What's it for?" I asked. "It's for our grease!"

Plus ca change. Mom just keeps it in a Miracle Whip jar.